Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Am I bored or boring?

I've always felt that I was one of the least exciting people you could meet. In all honesty, I don't do anything. I go to work and I go home Monday through Friday. Saturday I go grocery shopping and Sunday I rest. I'm a loner and a homebody, and that has to change.

I go on Youtube, Facebook, and other blogs. And it seems that peoples lives are so exciting. Or are they exciting because it someone else, and I get to what they do when they aren't in the public eye? Though I must admit that I am nosy and always wonder what it's like to live as someone else.

Then again, they say boredom comes from not doing what you don't love. Sadly, what I love is not profitable. I enjoy doing art, it's an escape for me. I also enjoy reading. But, what really makes me happy is sitting an thinking. I love reading something and sitting for a few hours and letting what I read float around in my head for awhile, analyzing the new information that I learned. Sadly, you can't make money doing that.

I think that's why I enjoy art because it gives my mind a chance to wander. When my mind wanders I feel tranquil, I feel calm and happy. But, on the other hand scientist say that a wandering mind is an unhappy one. And the according to Christian scholars a wandering mind is an attack from Lucifer.

I think in my case it's because I'm unhappy. My routine is the same everyday; I get up to work, finish work, and I go home. It's been the same thing over and over again for the past three years. Perhaps, it's time for me to move on.

The thing I'm struggling with is, what do I move on to?

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